Hey, I’m Celia and I live with schizoaffective disorder depressive type. Schizophrenia runs in my family.
Everything peaked for me when I was 27 years old. I spent 8 or so months acutely psychotic. The first 6 months were spent without any psychiatric help. I was over 1,000 miles away from everyone I knew.
I did not understand that I was sick. I suffered from severe anosognosia.
I was in a terrible relationship with someone who did not care about me.
And because I have always been a quiet, introvert that doesn’t say much, my loved ones did not know. For some time, I refused to call my loved ones and rarely used text messaging.
When I was loaded up into the ambulance and transported to the ER one night after spending the day wandering outside during a hail storm in Washington, the only thing I had to say to the paramedic sitting in the back with me was that I was 25% male.
I was held for a month at the psychiatric hospital.
I went on and off my medications for 4 years after that because of medication paranoia, anosognosia and my own shame.
Every time I would go off my meds, I’d land back in the psychiatric hospital.
I reached the point where some of my family lost hope that I would ever improve.
I left my 13 year abusive relationship and moved in with my aunt, uncle and cousins.
It was not easy, but I started improving a couple months later. My family was there for me in every way.
Now, five years later, I’m doing well. Yeah, I still live with psychotic symptoms, but my life is drastically different and drastically better. I’m thankful for the people in my life and my health.
Thanks for reading!